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Humoring Cancer

These are the everyday sentences that gravitate my way and my replies.  

1.     Your strong
Like most people I’m a brilliant actor.
2.    You look better now than you did last month…
Hmm! I do believe you said that last month. Do I sense a white lie?
3.    You should be taking it easy…
Yes, but I need to breath too
4.    So does this mean you’re done?
Well the oncologist thought I was, but I keep going back because I love her bedside manner.
5.    I like your hat
Yeah I'm auditioning for the new Hovis advert

6.    My Aunt had cancer and died
Sorry to hear about that, but I’m Sarah Mendoza and I'm very much alive.
7.    How do you cope?
I don't... do you?
8.     I don’t know what I would do if someone cut my breasts?
Well I don’t think you’ll have much choice it is that or pushing up the daisies.
9.     I like your attitude
Tell my husband that 
10. I have breast pain what do I do?
Why are you stood here talking to me get to your GP and get it checked?

And I do hear some of these sentences over and over again and my replies remain the same...